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Acting out of anger?Here is what you need to consider

It's hard not to take decisions when I am nervous. 🙄


I am an action-taker, goal getter type of girl so when things don't seem right the things that seems natural is to do something about it.


😳And I've done this so many times...that I have to reckon is not always the wisest thing to do.


↪For starters, "fixing" something is not the best type of motivation one can have.


↪Secondly when something really triggers us badly it's wise to understand what is actually behind this rage. We might see the tip of the iceberg although it's the iceberg that drives our behaviour. Who or what are we actually trying to protect?


↪Thirdly, are we adults enough to recognise how our expectations are influencing our perceptions? How are our beliefs, values, experiences impacting our judgement?


Latest reminder was my girl's first day of school. She doesn't like that the curriculum is well known to her. She would have preferred to start from a higher grade. She wants more flexibility, some history and science so long story short she hates it.


After the first couple of days I was agitated because of this and hardly resisted the temptation to do something about it. Then it occurred to me in how many ways I am influenced by my own "ways":

I am pro-homeschooling

I believe in giving children flexibility to learn what they like most

I am an introvert (Deliah is extrovert)

I was always a top student and over years I realised this wasn't necessarily a good use of my time and resources

I resent the Romanian ways of teaching

I homeschooled Deliah for a while and have some lovely memories related to that

I have also some bad memories from elementary school

I believe like most parents that my kid can achieve whatever she puts her mind to...and I hate when she starts doubting that cause of grownups

And I can probably add more.


❗Point is, the stronger we react to something the more likely this is triggering something inside us that is deeper than it seems.


❗The stronger the urge to react, the wiser it is to take some time for introspection, reframing and changing perspectives before taking any decision.

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